Without U

I saw and I saw a piece of heaven today. Made me realise how much I missed. Hope will take care. I'll move on. I really hope will achieve that happiness are hoping to get.

Miss

Yes. I still do miss you. I'm still hurtin as bad if not worse. I'd be lying to say I don't. I hope you don't blame me for being how I am now. Chiding, being cold and ignoring you hurts me but I know you'd like this cos it helps build your new relationship better. I'd be happy for you if he really loves you and will take good care of you. Do tk care. Like I said my time is almost up. You should know too. I dread the day it comes...but I am craving for the pain to stop.

I still love you. I always will.

It's 6.30am and my eyes are still wide open. I have a feeling it's insomnia. Haven't been sleeping until 6-8am this couple of days. Then wakin up at 11-12. Rolling around on my bed isn't exactly fun.

I don't feel tired physically but very fatigued mentally. I guess I'm just acting strong. Will my body just give up? I hope it will. I'm still harping over spilt milk. Craving for it. Even though I know however hard I try I'll at most I'll only get to lick the dirty milk off the ground and get case of bad diahorrea.

Stubborn? I'd prefer to think myself as hopeful. Even though there is no more hope left I will never choose to give up on what we had...give up on you. I'll still be here for you...as a friend or as a tool. Whenever you need me. I assure you. I will be here for you.

Heard this song awhile ago and it hit the spot on how i'm feeling right now. Mando-poppish but listen to the lyrics. I included the lyrics but please lsiten. I think he sang the feelings out very well. You'll get what I mean. I hope you feel the same way too. I'm always waiting for you. I still miss you every second.



那一条牙膏在对我傻笑
嘲笑我永远用不掉
想睡就睡
想闹就闹
好快乐少了人唠叨
蓝色的碗盘多买了一套
我忘了没人陪我通宵
要多少替代的丑角
无辜的陪笑
才会让我能真的忘了你的好
我在搞笑藉着热闹掩盖着心跳
边哭边笑偏要说着一个人真好
当人群散了 突然觉得我可以死掉 我受不了
还在搞笑害怕回家不知怎麽熬
这麽多年早就习惯有你的撒娇
我想我能熬
但是至少要让我知道 你好不好
我们的小狗食量变好小
眼神里常常显得无聊
它习惯睡觉的床尾少了一双脚
所以它常常看着门口睡不着
我在搞笑藉着热闹掩盖着心跳
边哭边笑偏要说着一个人真好
当人群散了突然觉得我可以死掉 我受不了
我在搞笑却在醉后眼泪拼命飙
你的离开失去多少我计算不了
忙完了一天突然觉得又何必辛劳 对谁炫耀
还在搞笑是否拥有麻痹的疗效
唱一夜歌却避不开催泪的曲调
我彻夜胡闹希望听到有人会提到 你好不好

Karma?
Retribution?
I think so
I'm sorry
I merely wanted our love again
I made you leave
What other evil do I not deserve
Now I'm stuck
I cannot go
Neither can I stay
This is living hell
I want to feel no more
Be a void
Be the void
Cos you were my world
Now there's nth
I would now give my life
To wish you happiness
But the ones I leave behind would lose it
It is my fault
I caused everyone ard me to hurt
Their constant kind words
I would forsake
I am evil
I do not wish to have this burden nor this pain
What can I do?

I miss the moments I have your fingers between mine
I miss your giggles
I miss looking forward to playing games with Dangles in your room
I miss Shiro walking in on us when we're havin fun and laughing
I miss the moments when I pick you up in a cab and you mesmerise me each time
I miss walkin ard Thailand with you just to look for clothes and a good nail place
I miss snoring beside you in bed and you stealing my blanket
I miss accidentally tickling you and seeing you squirm
I miss planning for us to relax
I miss hunting for new food and place for you
I miss looking into your eyes
I miss the smell of your hair
I miss so very very much more
I really really miss you